It is an amazing time in Jeremy World this Oklahoma weather
minus the threats of tornadoes have been awesome, but growing up in Oklahoma it
is what it is. I am grateful for what
GOD has allotted us, the cool, spring weather.
J is J
and only has 2 weeks of school left (WHOA).
Jeremy is pulling himself to objects, still has trouble getting his legs
under him but he is getting there, one day last week he got brave and let go of
everything and just stood in the middle of the floor for 2-3 minutes like he
was staring me down, I told him go ahead take off walking, I dare you. He is cruising around objects. When I got home yesterday, Matt his behavior
teacher was there to see him and hadn’t seen him since last August. J holding my hand and Matt’s walked into the
house, did the left/right leg and was able to lift his leg to get up the
step. I continue to be in awe of
him. Matt commented on how well Jeremy
was doing, getting around, matured, vocalizations, obeying, and then it was
time for Matt to leave and no kidding my son turned into a Gremlin.
This
morning I put shorts on Jeremy, which this time last year I couldn’t because he
was dragging his knees, not standing so he would literally tear his knees up,
but this year he’s a different child. My
mind went back to when Jeremy was 4 days old and discovered he was missing his
corpus callosum and the words the Neonatologist’s spoke to me that cut into my
soul, “He will never walk, never talk, he will be deaf, blind and mentally
retarded”. In those words spoken she
stole my dreams this wasn’t what I had visions of when I got to first look
Jeremy in the eyes, who had been kicking me for months. I was thrown into a medical world that I
didn’t want to be a part of and started to live a defeated life and then there was
the first follow up with Dr. Cyrus, everyone should have a Dr. Cyrus. Dr. C words were, “we don’t know what Jeremy
is going to do, so we are going to maximize his potential, let Jeremy show us
what he can do and don’t let him slip through the cracks, I will do my part and
you do your part”. I had never in my
entire life even known a child born with any special medical needs but that
moment I got my vision back. Dr. Cyrus
motivated me to be the mom for Jeremy plus at that point I was still afraid of
him, which is no longer the case I dearly love and respect that man, he is one
of Jeremy’s biggest fans.
There
have been many bible verses that I have claimed since Jeremy was born, James
1:5 is one of them, “If any lack wisdom, you should ask God, who gives
generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.” I lack so much wisdom when it comes to
parenting Jeremy. The God to Daniel who
saved him from the Lion’s Den is my GOD so because I believe in him, put my
faith, hope, trust and life in his hands, I have that same God as
yesterday. I don’t pretend to understand
all of life but I do trust and have faith in God.
I
remember when we first looked at fixing the spine, my prayer was, “GOD heal his
spine”. I knew if this was the plan he
could do it, he put Jonah in the belly of that fish and spit him out on the
shore. I started praying send us to that
surgeon/facility that he had picked out because I knew he had that place, he
knew J was going to have a difficult time.
When we went to St. Louis I seen a very negative surroundings and left
defeated, crying out to GOD, really? This is it? Help me to see it. My soul was unsettled and there was a drive,
that told me keep going you aren’t there yet.
I never dreamed that we were only 1 hour, 100 miles from St. Louis was
where we would be. Then Dr. Dan, I know
I frustrated him with endless questions and he frustrated with me with no
answers, it took us a few days to see that I was trying to understand and I
seen that he was doing what was best for Jeremy and was trying to understand
and I never doubted him. I was blessed
with his positive attitude and words. A
caring community, hospital that took us in because I was there alone and was
knocked to my knees. I was blessed with
the first resident I ever trusted or valued the opinion of, to hear him say, J
recovers fast. I think everyone needs a
Dr. Dan, that cares about Jeremy and wants what is best for him and can say,
“we aren’t proceeding because this isn’t right for J, and my medical knowledge
tells me one thing but J is doing another thing.”
I think everyone also needs the GOD of yesterday for today, because he is unchanged......
I think everyone also needs the GOD of yesterday for today, because he is unchanged......
No comments:
Post a Comment